We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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