Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
