Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
