Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
