did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
