doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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