The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
