it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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