You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
