The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Randomize
