STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
