she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
