Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
