Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Less talking, more tequila
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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