if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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