In the future we'll all be gay
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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