How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
