Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
