If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
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