I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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