just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
she looked like the before picture.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize