he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
