This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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