What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
