are you so shy because you have an std?
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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