wrigley field is MILF paradise
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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