I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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