I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
