I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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