what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
