How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
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