Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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