Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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