Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
my sisters under your porch take her home
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Randomize
