Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
