Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
