Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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