The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
