I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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