haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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