I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize