Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
