Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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