I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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