She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I looked at my own cervix.
I wish i was in the wii world.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Randomize
