I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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