we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Randomize
