he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
