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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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