The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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