My brain says no but my pants say off.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
