hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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