Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Randomize
